Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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