the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
meet me or not, i'm out of control
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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