Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
