i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Randomize
