I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
