I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
