Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize