I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
