so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
