I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
