I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
