Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
