you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Randomize
