Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
