worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
pray to the hookup gods
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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