We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
