piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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