Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
