I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
