Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
