I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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