My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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