My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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