apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
