do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
organizing the empties. That sober.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
