I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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