I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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