just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
