And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
