You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
My dick has a subreddit
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
