dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
