You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
