they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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