how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
