i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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