I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
