He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
