the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i already hear my dad disowning me
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
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