I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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