she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
