i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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