ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
