So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Randomize
