I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I need a hoe opinion
go on
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize