You can't special order awesome
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
my liver is dry heaving
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
