If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
My hand turned me down
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
