well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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