3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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