So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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