would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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