You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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