if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
